How Solopreneurs Can Use the Law of Attraction to Grow Their Business

We have heard the expression, “You can have it all.” This may seem like a bit of a hyperbole, but it is not too far from the truth according to the Law of Attraction or the Law of Abundance. We may be quick to identify external challenges as the reason we have not reached our targets, but the real obstacle may be within. Discovering these obstacles and lifting them is a significant first step towards success as a solopreneur.

What are the Laws of Attraction and Abundance?

The Law of Attraction and the Law of Abundance are not identical, but they are related. The Law of Attraction states that people tend to attract results that are in keeping with their expectations. According to this theory, it includes the notion that we tend to attract positive people, for instance, if we have a positive attitude, and the inverse is also true.

The Law of Abundance takes the principles of the Law of Attraction and applies them to concepts of wealth. The notion of the Law of Abundance is that there is enough money for everyone who wants to seek it. Not everyone is highly motivated to seek abundance, but people can become motivated by examining their way of thinking and removing inner limitations.

What Steps Can You Take to Incorporate the Law of Abundance in Your Business?

Ask Yourself “Why Aren’t You Already Rich?”

You may be operating under the assumption that not everyone can have abundance by reasoning that there is only so much to go around, but remove that thought, and at least for the moment, suppose that wealth is under your control. Ask yourself, sincerely, why you aren’t rich. There may be a flood of reasons or just a few, mainly related to external circumstances. You may be surprised to realize that many of these are in essence not really external but are self-limiting beliefs.

Examine Your Reasons

Examine the reasons you came up with as answers to the question above. If you cite external causes, “Because I don’t have the right software” or “Because I don’t have the time.” You may find that you can trace each one of these to an internal self-limiting belief. Can you think of ways to free up more time? Could you take a small loan to buy software that will transform your business? Do you need the software to generate more revenues? Analyze each of these reasons carefully.

Look for the Hidden Lessons

Think of failures as lessons. Some failures seem out of our control, but if we look carefully, we can find things we could have done to prevent a hard impact. For instance, a financial crash may seem like it is outside of our control, but the lesson could be that it is always important to have a few months of income put away in case of emergencies. Perhaps the loss of a client was due to communication skills that can be improved or maybe the loss of that client could have paved the way for a higher paying one if we had just kept looking for opportunities.

Discover Your Main Internal Obstacle

Through this examination, you may have noticed one theme that keeps coming up. There may be one internal obstacle that is the biggest roadblock. It may be that you are worried about failure or you aren’t sure you can do it or maybe you don’t like having to deal with new technology. Be honest about what is holding you back and find ways to resolve these limitations so you can go forward and grow your business.

Are Your Money Mistakes Keeping You from Abundance?
Share your answer in the comments!

Dreaming of Hope, Growth & Love

I'm really excited about this team that I’ve discovered and joined.  I've been dreaming for quite a while that I wanted a team of like-minded people to work and build with, and boy I tell ya, this is it!  This is my answer.  I'm nowhere NEAR where I want to be, but for the first time in a long time, I really have that drive to make this happen.  We have a challenge this month!  $1000 bonus, for doing some scary but fun “schtuff” that is going to help others!  I’m totally DOWN!

 

Last night I was reflecting on my call with my mentor.  She shares about these opportunities that she's presented with to talk to people and share her passion and help them find theirs.  I mean she flips the script on telemarketers, tech support, door-to-door salesmen... She's appreciating and taking full advantage of every single opportunity that comes at her and she’s changing the lives of these individuals.

 

I wanna be like that!  I'm trying.  I printed off some business cards the other day to take with me to Walmart, I had the perfect opportunity but I totally chickened out. I was really frustrated that I didn’t do what I set out to do.  When I shared this with my mentor, she reminded me that it was my first attempt and that the next time will be a little bit easier.  And every time I practice, it will get a little easier each time!

 

So, a little backstory… stay with me here. I have a point.

 

I was in a relationship with a narcissist for 5 years.  That did a number on my self-esteem and confidence… especially in speaking and using my voice.  (You can read more about that HERE) The verbal and mental abuse was real y’all.  But I refuse to be a victim!  I’ve spent the last 4 years of my life healing and growing from that abuse… yes, I attempted healing before exiting the relationship… but I learned my lesson.  I make a lot of mistakes, and sometimes I make them twice or three times, but I do learn… eventually.  

 

Here’s my point… this journey with this team, it’s about more than financial freedom for me.  It’s about gaining more personal freedom of using my voice and believing in my voice.  It’s about me helping, encouraging, and teaching others to do it as well.  I honestly don’t sell a product (for real, it’s against the rules actually), I’m literally seeking out people that I can share my story with hopes of being honored with the privilege of hearing their story and seeing how we can help one another.  True, authentic, mutual friendships where there’s nothing but hope for growth and love for each other.

I’ll close with an affirmation that I wrote for myself. 
“I recognize all opportunities and register them as such the moment I lay my eyes on them.  I am prepared and open to each and every opportunity that is presented to me.”

The Morning I Called the Cops, Told the Truth, and Went to Jail

This is one of several blog posts in the series "But, I'm Stronger Now" that are pieces of my story of surviving a 5-year relationship with a narcisist.  I don't plan on writing them in chronological order.  I also won't go into too much depth with the arguments for a couple of reasons.  #1 the arguments were generally about cheating, drinking excessively, or me standing up for myself and him gaslighting me to the point of silence #2 I didn't know what gaslighting was until after our relationship ended.  The result of this lead me down rabbit holes of insanity in my head and I don't clearly remember details of certain events due to questioning myself for years.  The effects of long-term gaslighting can be devastating but you can gain your confidence back... mine is still getting stronger, but it is possible!

Now, onto the story...

I'm a night owl.  I always have been.  I typically would stay up until midnight on most nights but tonight I couldn't sleep.  He worked in the restaurant industry at this time and was working at a very popular bar & grill downtown, so closing time was 2 am.  I couldn't sleep, he had been unfaithful so much at this point that I was just looking for it.  Waiting for it to happen again... talk about manifesting.  I was creating my own world of shit by sitting there and allowing my emotions and my ego to seek out situations to pick fights in an attempt to change this person and make him love me the way I needed to be loved.  But I wasn't even loving myself.  Not by sitting there. 

Anwho, I was lying awake, wondering if he was going to get home on time.  And he didn't.  He wasn't responding to texts or phone calls.  He arrives and he's holding a clear "to go" container that the restaurant uses to package up 2 - 3 servings of soup... just to give you an idea of how much this container holds.  At first, I thought it was full of water... but I was very wrong.  It didn't take me long into our conversation to realize he was already drunk and was still drinking straight gin from this container.  His responses weren't making sense and he was just getting angrier and angrier.

I had been working on trying to start an Etsy business with some paper crafts and painting projects.  He was very upset that the business was taking time away from him.  I argued with this because again, EGO... the argument got worse as it lasted until the sun came up and elevated a bit to the point that he was scaring me.  He was threatening to hurt himself and started punching himself in the head, so I called the cops.  After I got off the phone, he was more in my face.  So I grabbed my bag and keys and headed for the front door.  He jumped in front of me and knocked my purse and keys out of my hands, and I turned to leave out through the back door, but before I made it there, he grabbed my jacket to stop me.  I turned and slid one arm out of the jacket while he was holding the other and I slapped him, he still didn't let me go so I slapped him again after repeatedly telling him to let me go.  That pissed him off to the point that he finally decided to leave me alone and went outside to wait for the cops and smoke a cigarette.  I just sat on the couch, trying to figure out what in the hell was going on with my life and what was going to happen next.

He gave the cops his report of me slapping him and wanted to press charges of course, so one officer stayed outside with him while the other one came inside to speak with me.  He asked me if it was true and I told him it was.  I explained the story and he asked me "Did you feel imprisoned?" my egotistical response was "No, I could've whopped his ass, but I didn't want to hurt him." The officer even gave me a 2nd chance to answer this question, but I answered it the same way.  I later realized #1 I wasn't strong than him and I couldn't whop his ass, and #2 I should've said Yes, I felt like he wasn't going to let me leave and I was scared.  Because that was the damn truth.  I was scared shitless but I wasn't going down without a fight damn it!  I was headstrong!

The officer then escorted me outside as politely as he could to tell me that I was under arrest for assault.  Once my ex saw them put the handcuffs on me he of course started saying he wanted to drop charges.  But this was labeled domestic violence case and the officer had to follow the procedure and I had to be detained until I could see a judge, which would be the next day.

You'd think that this would have been the end.  It wasn't.  This was about 3 years into the relationship.

The promises of quitting drinking, promises to go to counseling, promises of finding another job to remove the temptation... the promises all came pouring in.  The alligator tears and promises of no more lies and no more secrets.  

I fell for it.  Again.  In the name of love.  

I had no clue what love was.  I had to love myself enough to get out of this relationship.  It took another year before I would become aware of this reality.

Until the next story, if you find yourself in a narcissistic or abusive relationship and you're reading this, please speak with someone confidentially about your situation.  Gain the support that you need, to reignite the confidence and self-love that you need to exit the abuse and get help to do it safely if necessary.  You are not alone.  https://www.thehotline.org/

 

I Used To Be An Optimist!

At one point in my life I considered myself an optimist.  I do believe I was a bit confused though.  I wasn't so much an optimist as I was someone that knew how to put on a happy smile even when things weren't going good.  I couldn't allow anyone around me to know what I was enduring at home in my relationship.  It was my protection, my wall.

Well flash forward to now, I'm in a happy marriage where my husband allows me to have feelings even if they don't make sense to him.  We've both endured many traumas in our lives before we came together, and while we did do quite a bit of healing before coming together... healing is still occurring.  Breaking old habits is still happening.  I'm so thankful for a him and his beautiful, graceful understanding and acceptance of the person that I am.  The Good the Bad and the UGLY!  lol  But it's time to work on this shiz.

Here's the deal though, while his understanding and acceptance is wonderful, there comes a point where I have to dig down a little deeper and push past this negative cycle that I've landed myself in.  His understanding can only take me so far.  I am surrounded by people that love and support me and remind me more often that I feel I deserve sometimes, that I'm awesome.  But my negative self talk tends to have a bit of a louder voice than my loved ones.  It over powers in my alone times, and I allow it to take full control.

I don't know how long I've been on this struggle bus.  Even in moments of clarity and awareness of one thing, I feel like I'm oblivious to other areas of my life that need work too.

But I've been mean to myself for long enough.  

I accomplished 20 days of yoga!  

Then I began a new morning routine to allow for peaceful moments for regular daily yoga along with some other self care tasks to recognize the good that I'm doing, and to work on quieting the negative self talk.  I really don't have the energy to dog myself when I'm pushing to the max to hold that plank for a whole 20 seconds!  I also relieve myself of shit to dog myself of when I'm drinking my water, taking my vitamins, washing my face, and getting dressed before 10am every day!  I feel a smidge like a bad ass... and I'll feel even more of a bad ass when I get to day 10 (today was day 6), and then to day 20, and so on and so forth.  10 seconds at a time, 10 days at a time.  

My heart is bruised enough from me beating myself up for not setting goals that were a little too big too soon, it's time to heal from my own personal shit right now and start small.  Time to be more intentional!  Small goals lead to big success!

Sometimes I feel as if I'm saying the same thing in different ways to myself, and maybe I am.  But if that is what it takes to become a better me tomorrow than I was yesterday than I'll continue to do it.  I am my own worst enemy, but it's about time to be my own bestie! <3  

Money Mindset - The Battle In My Head

I'm gonna talk about something, that for whatever reason, I've been afraid of talking about.  MONEY!  Part of being a successful entrepreneur includes bringing in money.  My relationship with money has never been very strong.  Discovering why is quite a lot of work, but I'm bound and determine to overcome this.  

Why am I so passionate about constant improvement and overcoming struggles?  Because I do believe that in doing this hard work, we can manifest our dreams and live a life that we desire?  Part of making dreams come true, does and will include money!  So let's get to work!

I plan on turning my notes and journal entries while I'm working on this stuff into a blog post series "Money Mindset - The Battle In My Head".  

I started reading Denise Duffield Thomas' book, Get Rich, Lucky Bitch.  It is helping me work through some of my own personal fears and ridiculous thoughts around MONEY and MY LIFE.  You can check out her book on Amazon and when you purchase it you get a lot of other resources from her as well... including a 5 day Manifesting Workshop that I'm referring to on a daily basis.  It's good stuff.

Let me know if you get this book, I'd love to chat about our discoveries together! 

And in case you need a reminder like I do every now and then...

My Entrepreneurial Journey

I want to note before we get started, success probably doesn't mean the same thing to me as it does to you.  It's different for everyone.  ;)

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My mom and I were dreamers.  We would talk about business ideas and plan every step of the way, but then we would end the conversation with "That's what dreams are made of.".  Because of this mindset growing up, I struggled to really believe that entrepreneurship was possible for me.  I began following in my mom's footsteps, focusing on learning all I could about computers, Microsoft suite, and the skills that I would need to work in an office.  

I was a dreamer, but naturally I was also an optimist.  So I did have phases of inspiration flow and I would work for a while to bring something to fruition.  A few times I did well, but struggled with a stable mindset through it all and consistency was lacking when life would get hard.

In 2006ish I did fairly well with Avon, but I didn't handle my money well.  I had a number of loyal clients, and a few businesses that would allowed me to put brochures in their office/lobby.  I don't recall exactly how long I sold Avon, but I do believe it was about a year.

For a short time, I made paper beads and sold the jewelry that I made on Etsy.  Very few sales came from this, but I LOVED making the paper beads and jewelry, so I kept up with this until I became pregnant with my son.  The paper bead making turned to paper crafting and creating fun little paper creations like bird houses, ornaments, cards, and Valentine's gifts.  I tried selling my creations and had a couple of sales, but nothing consistent.  At this point I wasn't really educating myself on how to market what I was doing.

After this I tried a digital scrapbooking business that I gained zero sales from, a candle / wax company that the only customers I had was my mom, and a couple of close friends.  With these 2 businesses crashing so hard compared to the responses I had from Avon, I was lost and discouraged and just stuck with focusing on my full time job.  After all, by this time I was a single mom with a little boy to raise and I needed to get serious.

So for a while I did focus on my career.  I would still craft and create and make things as gifts.  By this point many of the people that knew me knew that I was pretty crafty and would ask for something special. This inspired my entrepreneurial side and my mom and I started brainstorming some other ideas for Etsy businesses.  She was blowing and painting eggs, and we both loved the idea of putting together craft kits for others to try new crafts.  So I helped her open an Etsy shop where she had 2 sales over the course of a couple of months.  She continued to create and kept her spirits high, but not too long after this she was laid off from her job, diagnosed with cancer, battled for about 4 months before leaving this earthly realm.  <3

I grieved hard, and during this time I wasn't taking care of myself.  I was barely getting dressed each day, and had just began working from home.  I was driving to get coffee one day and I saw a Paparazzi Jewelry sign on the back of someones car.  It really caught my attention and I looked it up when I got home.  I just felt like it was a sign.  I was in transition and really wanting to get out of the job that I was in and had just watched my mother's life slip away so quickly right before my eyes.  It was glaringly obvious that LIFE IS SHORT and all I have is NOW!  SO I signed up and ran what I call a successful business for 2 years.  I had a team of individuals that I loved to work with.  They were motivated and so was I.  I LOVED doing live videos on Facebook and I had a number of people that looked forward to my lives for the laughs and games that we would play.  It was such a fun time!  The sales were great, and I just poured the extra right back into the business or into my team.  I had a large inventory (I still have some). 

I went through a really rough breakup from a really rough 5 year relationship.  The break up took everything out of me and I needed to focus on myself and healing.  I no longer had the drive to do LIVE videos.  I just wanted to focus on healing and learning to love myself again.  I still had my full time job working from home, and doing this allowed me to begin to learn yoga and do things that made me happy and healthy.  I took a solo trip to the beach for a day, I made new friends, took myself on dates, cooked healthy dinners for my son and I, planned game nights for us to create a new normal in our life.  I discovered Grace & Frankie on Netflix.  I also developed some very strong friendships that helped me along this path.  It really was a true time of healing.

During my time of healing I discovered the gifts of painting, sketching, and doodling.  Doing these things was healing in themselves.  I was expressing myself through my drawings and painting and it was just... freeing!  Not long after this I developed a strong friendship with my now husband.  We would talk daily through texting and soon began dating.  One of the first gifts he gifted to me was a huge box full of art supplies.  Things that I didn't have to support my creation.  He expressed his belief in my gifts verbally and with the gift.  Once we moved in together he would make sure that I had time to do my art.  And if I wasn't taking time to do it, he would encourage me to.  

My husband also knows and understands my strong desire to be a successful entrepreneur and he continues to show his belief in me.  I became unemployed during the pandemic, and I have been gifted the opportunity to work on developing exactly what I want.  I've been doing that, but my consistency continues to lack.  Or that's what my ego likes to remind me of.  But I know that all of my endeavors have taught me lessons that I need in order to get to where I want to be.  I'm also reminded... it's not about the destination... it's about the journey.

The journey over the last 3 years has been quite wild and all over the place, but in today's world, it's easier than ever to make your mark and earn income at the same time.  I discovered "done for you" content that lead me to utilizing some of the done for you coloring pages that I invested in and turn them into Shrink Charm Kits for kiddos.  I created a number of FB communities in order to teach what I was learning from the "done for you" community, also known as the PLR community.  I've learned more about affiliate marketing and have learned to incorporate that into Expressions to bring in some extra income.  I have an Etsy store where I sell Procreate Stamps that I've created along with a number of other digital products.  My current endeavors on top of Expressions right now, is Mini Van Go Studio.  

My reason for continuing this journey, no matter how many times I fail, is because I enjoy being home with my family.  I enjoy being able to homeschool.  I love creating and learning new things and sharing my knowledge with others.  When I think of my entrepreneurial journey my "nope" self wants to tell me "Really, when are you gonna give up already?" but giving up isn't an option.  I'm enjoying this journey... every step of the way.  Every opportunity for me to express and share something with the world is a blessing, and I'm so grateful for the many opportunities that are available.

If you are in a situation that you could use some extra cash or are interested in your own entrepreneurial journey, I'd love to chat with you.  The entrepreneurial life can be designed however you choose.  Don't worry I won't push any specific idea on you.  I love brainstorming all the possibilities that there are based on the gifts and interests you already poses.  I would love to share what I know if it could save you a little time and trouble.  Let's connect and grow together.  

Breaking Family Ties

I was raised in a home that believed FAMILY WAS EVERYTHING and our family gatherings were sacred, it was a place of appreciation for one another and fellowship.  When I say family I'm talking 2 -3 generations gathering for a meal.  However, the separation between my family and I began with the passing of my grandfather.  

Witnessing the separation between siblings while he rested fairly peacefully for the last few hours of his life on this earth, it was confusing and hard for me.  Seeing them fall apart because of disagreements on inheritance and other things that I still don't fully know or understand.  At such a sensitive time, that's what they were worried about.  I was in my late 20's and still quite naive, but I believed something like this would never happen... not in MY FAMILY!

I only recently became aware and fully understand now why this family meant so much to my mother, and why she raised me to believe this way as well.  She was a single mother and during her rises and falls in life, her family supported her a lot through her struggles and she felt so much love, respect and appreciation for all of their support that she raised me with that same belief.  They were the same for me growing up.  I have many fond memories with each of my family members of them being a very loving figure in my life!

I'm not here to bash or bad mouth my relatives.  People change, grow, things happen, feelings get hurt.  I am here to share my belief that being "family" doesn't excuse you from the struggles of life, but it also doesn't mean that anyone has a free pass to disrespect or mistreat you either.

The 2nd stage of my separation from my family began when my mother passed away.  It was made very clear to me on several occasions that the relatives that I was raised to respect were great life supporters for my mother, but they weren't for me.  The respect was obviously not mutual.  My feelings were hurt, I shut down and I stopped visiting as often.  I did this all without communicating with anyone.  For all I know, the only person that knew my feelings were hurt was me.

The final stage happened when my grandmother passed away.  There was no communication with me about anything regarding her passing, the memorial service, or the grave side service.  I was extremely hurt and angry and I sent an email to one of my uncles declaring my anger and disappointment in being related to him.

That anger has been hanging around in me for quite some time now.  Repressed anger really isn't good for our physical body or our mental health.  So let's get back to my earlier point.  After acknowledging all of this anger, I've been having to come to terms with some things to help me let go of that anger.  

#1 My here and now is worth more than the outburst of emotions caused by past situations.

#2 My relatives experienced losses just as much as I did, I acted out in ways that I'm not proud of and I'm sure they did as well.  It didn't serve me and vice versa... no need to point fingers when I have my own mess to clean up.

#3 Not everyone is meant for me or to be a part of my life and vice versa.

#4 Your actions may have disappointed them just as much as their actions disappointed you.  When expectations are not communicated it can cause some of the nastiest feelings.

#5 Mama, I'm so glad that the "family" was there to support you in your life, but family has a new meaning for me.  😉

I do still believe in family and how important it is... an example, my husband and children are my number 1 priority.  During these years of separating and breaking these "family" ties I have added new family members, or I also like to call them tribe members.  Individuals that serve amazing purposes in my life, supporting me in many ways, and I am always looking for opportunities that I can be of service and support to them in their lives as well.  

Were you raised in a household that believes FAMILY IS EVERYTHING?  I'd love to hear from you on this topic over in our Expressions - The Community.